Saturday, February 21, 2009

Getting Things Done

Why, oh why, is it so hard to get things DONE? Big things and little things. I feel like I spend my life trying to do just one more load of laundry... one more load of dishes... straighten up just one more room... take the dog for just one more walk...

I long for a sense of completion. To be able to cross a task off my list once and for all. To dot the i's, cross the t's and file it away. To not have to think about it anymore, not have it hang over my head like a black cloud that refuses to lift.

I realize that the daily and weekly chores aren't ever going to be done, though, and that both scares and saddens me. To know that I'm going to have to match socks for the rest of my life? AUGH!

But there are some things that can be done. Completed. Finished. Like, my PhD. I'm so sick of thinking about it, revising it, editing it. I just want it to be DONE. At this point, I don't even care if it makes sense, I just want to be done. With luck, though, that day should come soon. Then maybe I can relax.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Gourmet Kidlets

I was a picky child when it came to food (just ask my mother). I didn't eat "junk", but I had my favorite few meals and I stuck to them. Mom would try new stuff, but I would throw a fit, so she was reduced to the same old, same old.

Imagine my surprise that I appear to be raising 2 gourmets. Their daycare does a fantastic job with meals, serving a great variety from different cultures. They have meals like chicken alfredo or baked fish, veggies like asparagus or spinach, fruits like mango. At their age, I had no IDEA those foods even existed.

But the kidlets vacuum it all up. At the grocery store, Jake will actually choose asparagus as his green vegetable. And Phoebe will try anything, multiple times. Her teacher told me that yesterday the kitchen served ground beef, but no spices on it. She apparently kept taking bites, spitting some out, and trying again--in search of some with flavor!

Their Oma makes some delicious dishes, seasoned with spices I find appealing, but I wouldn't necessarily think children would like. THESE kids eat it up and look for more. Last night I fed them her food, then made myself a filet of tilapia, with garlic and lemon juice. Phoebe banged her high chair until I gave her some, which she chowed down.

I am glad they both are gourmets. I just find it terribly funny!

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Change

Change is a funny thing. Some people embrace it--flitting like butterflies from job to job, situation to situation. Living for the thrill of newness and unexpected circumstances.

Other resist change like it's a disease. Digging their feet in, and getting dragged kicking and screaming into change.

I like to think I'm closer to the former than the latter. I'm about to find out.

My job was just eliminated. The place is being reorganized, changed. I can apply for the new job that will be created, but there are no guarantees, no promises that I will continue to be employed here. Continuing my employment means learning a new skill set, changing how I do what I do. Not continuing my employment means finding something else, something new to do.

That change can be a good thing. Changing by learning and opening your mind is exciting. I welcome the chance to stretch myself, learn new technology and move into the future. But this future might or might not include me. Change that is paired with extreme uncertainty is not as exciting.

But I wanted, I needed a change. I was stuck in a rut. Despite my successful efforts to learn a new career and challenge myself, it's still been hard to actually MAKE a change. And now it's forced on me.

In the weeks ahead I'll find out more about the change, what I can do and what I can't do. Where I can go. What my options are. What grand new adventures are ahead of me! I look forward to change and the opportunity to re-invent myself. Out with the old and in with the new.

Yeah, but can I say I'm still just a bit scared?